I hope that all of you enjoyed the day yesterday! I wanted to share what has happened in the year since I wrote about grandparenting with vision loss, the joys and the challenges. Well to quote an old song “the beat goes on…”
A Tip to Adult Children
I understand that you are caught in the middle. These are your parents and now visual impairment is changing their lives and yours. Like my children, you have a picture of what a grandparent is probably based on your own grandparents and now Mom and Dad don’t fit that picture. Dealing with vision loss is often frightening for them and for you. There are many times when you are not sure if they can still participate in activities; this includes grand-parenting. Your parents may need reassurance that they can be involved in your children’s lives. Bring the baby to them and put her in their arms. Remember these are the same arms that held you. Encourage them to join you. Provide the transportation if that is an issue.
The picture above is of Leslin and me having coffee. What you don’t see is our chauffeur, my granddaughter Lizz, who also joined us.
We enjoy doing things together. Your parents may not be able to see the ballgame or dance recital, but both your parents and your children will know they were there. And, if asked, their grandchild was the best one there! Give them pictures of your children and take pictures of them with your children. I promise you, from my own proud experience, that you don’t have to be able to see the picture to show off your grandchild.
Traditions
Every family has traditions and often these are taught by the grandparents. Maybe it is a special sauce or song; maybe it is how a holiday is celebrated. This can be anything special to your family. For one of my friends, the Black Friday shopping trip was one such tradition. She and her family were trying to tell Grandma to stay home and Grandma was having no part of that idea. You should know that in addition to vision loss, Grandma is 96. This lady decided that it was time the next generation learned about this important tradition. So her 15 year old granddaughter assisted her and the tradition was passed on!
Other traditions may change. Reading to the little ones in my family is a generations-old tradition. When my granddaughter Lizz and her husband were expecting Leslin, they had a gender reveal party – a new tradition. Lizz asked each grandparent to bring a story book to begin a collection for the baby. Mine also has a braille overlay. I watched Leslin and her daddy read this the other night, and she traces the braille on the pages as she has seen me do when I read it to her.
Be Part of Their Lives
It does take some getting used to not to yell at the umpire; even if he was wrong he probably sees better than you do. I still go to any event. My grandchild knows I am there and that is what is important. I attended Madeline’s graduation last spring. Although it is a small school, the crowd was still unnerving for me. But the point is I did it and we both have the memories!
Happy Grandparent’s Day! Make some memories.
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